Grief is on the minds (and bodies) of many these days. For some, managing it in a healthy way can feel like a full-time job. Grief rituals can offer a sanctuary where we can name our grief while being witnessed by others, and where we can further the work of processing it to some degree. This event will offer a facilitated ritual space for participants to name some of what they grieve, while other participants bear witness. The event will run for 2-3 hours, and will start at 1 pm US Eastern Daylight Time on Sunday, May 5, 2024. Registration for this event is free, though donations will be gratefully accepted.

This event will be facilitated by Eric Garza, Quillwood Academy’s founder and primary event facilitator. Eric recently completed a 6-month online training with Francis Weller, author of The Wild Edge of Sorrow: Rituals of Renewal and the Sacred Work of Grief, on the facilitation of grief ritual spaces. If the interest is there and the event goes well he will likely offer more events like this, both online and in person. You can read a more about Eric here.

In The Wild Edge of Sorrow, Francis Weller names five Gates of Grief to help readers recognize the different forms grief can take in our lives. These gates represent entryways to explore past or present events that have left deep emotional imprints on our lives. Grief is a general term that can include sorrow or sadness, but can also include anxieties of various flavors, anger, rage, and other emotions. Others have expanded on Weller’s original five gates, and Eric has massaged the list further. When we convene on May 5 Eric will introduce the following four gates of grief as a starting point for our ritual engagement:

First Gate: Personal grief – this includes grief associated with harm done to us by others, harm we have done to ourselves, and harm that we have done to others.

Second Gate: Ancestral grief – grief associated with harm done to our ancestors, or harm our ancestors perpetrated on others

Third Gate: Empathic grief – grief we feel for others who endure harm, who harm themselves, or who harm others

Fourth Gate: Anticipatory grief – grief borne of our fear of an uncertain future

This offering will be limited to 15 participants. When you register using the link above, you will be added to the list of registrants. If more than 15 people register, Eric will email everyone to let them know whether they are among the first 15 registrants, or whether they are further down the list. When Eric starts the meeting he will let in the 15 at the top of the list first, then will let others in to take the place of those who did not show up until we have 15 people. Please join the meeting 5 minutes before its start time. Once our meeting has 15 people, others who are in the waiting room will be alerted that we are full and that they will not get to participate. If this event runs smoothly, future iterations may be expanded.

The ritual will follow this general format: Eric will begin by offering an invocation before inviting participants to briefly introduce themselves to the group, to name something they are grateful for, and to name a grief they bring to the group. Once this round finishes Eric will invite a second round where participants can expand on the grief they named or introduce another. Depending on how long this takes we might start a third round. The ritual will end with a closing round where participants can check in about their experience, and Eric will close the circle.

Please note that this event may attract participants from across the English-speaking world, so there will inevitably be cultural differences in communication styles, speaking patterns, and how words are chosen to convey meaning. Those who participate in this event are expected to abide by this set of agreements.

To participate in this event you will need to install Zoom conferencing software on your computer or phone and create an account. When you register for the event, you will receive a confirmation email from Zoom with the link you will need to join the meeting. You will also receive a reminder email an hour or two before the meeting starts.

When you register for this event, your email address will be added to Quillwood Academy’s email list if you are not already subscribed. You can unsubscribe at any time.